Data gets a girlfriend (sorta), the Enterprise gets a poltergeist (not really), the O'Briens bicker over socks (kinda), and an engineer fall through the floor and dies horribly when the floor rematerializes (really). The TNG Rewatch does "In Theory."

An excerpt:

To Moore and Menosky’s credit, the minute the stakes are raised — when Van Mayter is killed (and brutally so; the image of half her body sticking up out of the floor was one that stuck with me for weeks after watching the episode) — the silly romance plot is abandoned until the ship is out of danger. Though that part of it has its moments of ridiculousness, not the least being Picard insisting on piloting the shuttle. This is a ship with a thousand people on board, they must have dozens of qualified pilots. In what universe does it make sense for the captain — who by his own admission way back in “11001001” hadn’t taken the conn in years — to be the one to do the incredibly risky piloting? (To make matters worse, he half-asses the job, and gets the shuttle destroyed. Imagine what might have happened with a good pilot.)

http://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/blog/friday-videos-like-your-and-youre-gotye

Via Maria Popova and Brainpickings comes this marvelous piece of NSFW grammar rap: 

Link!

I hope your weekend is wonderful for you and yours! 

Categories: Friday Videos, General Bitching

---

http://smartbitchestrashybooks.com/blog/caption-this-cover-horror-edition-winners

Should I infict the clown cover upon you another time? Yes, I think I shall: 

She's got pigtails and a considering expression on her face.

He's, well, if you have a clown phobia, he's the most terrifying ever. If you don't have a clown phobia, he's still kind of terrifying.

So who wins the caption that cover HORROR EDITION?

 

 

Honorable Mention goes to:

Maureen: "I think when you put "Every Woman's Fantasy" on your internet profile, Mr. Pennywise you were slightly misleading."

Flo_Over for an entire rewrite of "Send in the Clowns." *applause*

Jules: "Vagina. It's Not a Clown Car."

MeghanPA: "There's still room in the backseat of the VW with me and the boys, all 16 of us..."

AztecLady1: "Wanna make balloon shapes with me?"

Jason: "How about "Pancake Makeup and Sausage Gravy"?"

Ciar Cullen: "He was...The most interesting man in the world. It was such a tragedy that Sally was blind and couldn't appreciate all he had to offer her."

Mary Stella: "A little song, a little dance, a little Chuckles in your pants."

Arloa: (Imagine soulful Ryan Gosling here) "Hey girl, sorry about this costume, but it's the only way we can be together in public without my being mobbed. Your skin is so soft."

LauraN: "Did Sarah have the courage, the faith, the . . . humor to trust her heart to a wereclown?" (Thanks for creeping me out, there, LauraN. shudder Wereclowns.)

And the Cover Captioning Runners Up are: 

 

KarenF: "No. I said I wanted to be a cover model FOR Harlequin."

Hannah: "I said, "Why don't you try going down," not "Why don't you try going clown!""

and Oaxavamama: "Jane knew she shouldn't have made that last wish while still nursing her head cold. What she'd really said was, "I want someone to go down on me."

Emily A: "When Katniss saw the District 2 contestants, she knew by their clothes she could take 'em."

 

Winner, for making me snort-laugh:

Jennifer, for "Fortunately, Snowqueens Icedragon's fanfic regarding John Wayne Gacy was not as popular."

Congratulations Jennifer, and thank you to everyone who entered - and to artist Elaine Duillo for painting that fantasticness. Jennifer, please email me at sarahATsmartbitchestrashybooksDOTcom to claim your $25 bookstore gift card. Everyone, have a lovely weekend, full of all the funny things you like best (and fear least)! 

Categories: Caption This Cover, Covers Gone Wild! (Non-Snoop Dogg Edition), General Bitching

---

I get emails all the time from fans who want to be on GAME OF THRONES.

Here's your chance. The call has gone out for extras for season three.

https://www.extrasni.com/news

Of course, it helps if you actually live in Northern Ireland.

Or the Republic of Ireland.

Or Scotland or England or the Isle of Man... y'know, someplace where you can actually get to the shoot. If you're in South Africa, Brazil, or Japan, your chances of getting a call are not good, alas.

On the other hand, if you're a bearded long-haired amputee from Derry, you should be gold.

I read from Goblin Precinct, and talk some about the series as a whole. Plus news on V-Wars and a request regarding the Parsec Awards.

You can download the episode from iTunes (either from the podcast's own feed, or via The Chronic Rift Network), the Rift web site, or from Mevio's DKR page. You can comment here on the blog, DKR's Facebook page, on the Rift web site, by e-mail to keith at decandido dot net, or by phone at 888-866-9010.

We're talking about Celia Jerome's newest Willow Tate novel Life Guards in the Hamptons over at the DAW Books blog (dawbooks)! Swing on by and check it out!

and I'm off! Note to self: next book, take release week off. So very sick yesterday. Bleak.
Today, I'm feeling better and off to Chicago this afternoon. For Chicago folks, I'll be reading at Women & Children First Bookstore tomorrow night (5/19) at 7:30PM (well to the north of downtown). http://www.womenandchildrenfirst.com/event/sappho’s-salon-7